26 September 2011

.what the f***k??: how can you not love Berlin.

Another nice trip with a mission. Maybe 10.000 people against Pope's visit is not enough comparing to 70.000 coming to meet him (what was their reasons - I'll never know) but it was definitely worth it. Poor Benedict, he had no idea how insidiously I used his visit to have an excuse to organize my own meeting.
Unfortunately, being in a member of a club of "Always missing someone" I'm never satisfied completely about set of friends around me. Someone is always missing. That means I always miss someone. Thanks to English for that clever indention.
This time it was almost perfect.
Almost, as always.
I don't like that we didn't talk this much we could. I don't like, that I'm not sure, what is still between us and what has changed. I don't like the feeling of growing distance, just when my heart is so ready to get close. I think I'm already too far from you to ask for explanation or understanding. I'm so sorry that perhaps we really lost it.
I don't like when we argue because of things we both didn't care to say, and because we don't care about each other as much as we should. And still sometimes we're to haughty to admit it. I'm worried how things will develop without everyday warmth which I miss so much.
I'm happy for this short time we could be together and discover these beautiful places. I love the energy and the delight we spread between us like a thin thread.
I love that I still  didn't have time to tell you all of those important things, what means, we will have more and more to talk and laugh about next time we meet. Some things you'll never get to know. I love those innocent hugs and touch which  make our hearts close.
I'm happy that we get on so well after so short time. I feel it is just SO beginnig !

I love that I trust you with my life.

14 September 2011

get used to a grey sky.

Finally I'm there. I feel so safe like coming back to a place I left and missed.
Time goes by so fast between talking, cooking, eating, getting to know each other, dumpster diving,  understanding and learning. The language is so beautiful, makes me think about all those poor German boys haunted by tree ghosts in 18th century forests. The more clear it gets, the more charming it sounds. And I talk. I feel like someone else is speaking inside of me, using the words which I didn't understand not so long ago.
And the room! I needed to start my adaptation process with this.
Also riding in black BMW through small towns listening to Kurdish hip-hop loud laughing and joking is not bad for the beginning.

 And the sky is so obviously grey. Just as I was told it will be.

3 September 2011

tonite we ride

For this life I've chosen trust is one of the things I appreciate the most. Because of that everything is possible and  everything collapses, when this simple trust is betrayed. We contact through emails from a distance of thousands of kilometers, we invite each other to our homes, we eat together sharing all we have, we listen so attentively to each other. We listen to our songs, our hopes, our voices, our joy. We want to be better, warmer, wiser, more significant.
We all love bikes. We all love empty cities by night. We all love those abandoned houses in which we spark a life. We all fall in love. We change the world sometimes.

Thank you for an amazing night, all of you, who joined me.

Ryan Harvey gig, 02.09.2011, "Eufemia" , Warszawa, Poland.